(Jenn)To make a long story short, let's just say that NO ONE reminded me about the cruel 2+ weeks of suffering that follow delivering a baby (how did I forget? I don't know). To me, it is one of the most brutal injustices placed upon women. After 9 months of pregnancy and many hours of the most grueling pain known to humankind, we still get to deal with the postpartum muck. And all we want to be doing is sitting on the couch (not on a donut pillow!) holding our precious babies. Why did no one warn me about this? I feel I must include my warning here, to maintain my integrity. If you want actual details, feel free to call me!
I have no idea what we would have done if my mom hadn't been here for 2 weeks. She held the baby for hours when I couldn't. She took Henry on all the outings I couldn't begin to think of taking him on.
She played cars stuck in traffic on the George Washington Bridge to keep Henry from driving the rest of us crazy. She cooked delicious food. She kept our house in sparkling condition. She did laundry. She didn't complain about my endless complaining. We all had a lovely time. The time went by much too quickly, and as the boys left to take her back to the airport last Saturday, Henry cried, "I don't WANT to go to the airport and leave Grandma Lori there! I want her to stay HERE!"His cries may as well have been mine. On Monday, reality struck. I had to take the TWO KIDS to the pediatrician BY MYSELF for a morning appointment, followed by a trip to the pharmacy to pick up a prescription for my latest complication. Let's just say the three of us were simultaneously in tears at several different points. Meanwhile, Ben's first problem sets are taking him approximately 8 hours each to complete (probably about 6 hours longer than I anticipated). Ouch!
Iversons to the rescue! Ben's parents showed up Tuesday night and resumed Grandma Lori's roles, constantly reassuring me that I looked pale and needed yet another nap. I was feeling quite a bit better by the time they left on Friday, so we were able to do a few fun things together, like a lovely picnic along the Charles River. Unfortunately, I missed the boat and forgot to take pictures!
I'm bracing myself for another reality check when Ben goes back to work tomorrow. We've realligned priorities and decided cleaning the house is no longer one of them! Maybe someday it will make its way back up the totem pole. We're just trying to stay afloat, not do any permanent psychological damage to Henry, and enjoy this stage as much as possible. It is such a precious time, albeit a difficult time to avoid "losing it." You'll see Ben and I have both found a new way of sneaking a nap in (sometimes it's the only way to get Ellis to sleep).
16 comments:
Jenn, I wish we could be closer to help. You look great (yes, even sleeping), and Ellis is darling. We hope you start feeling good again soon.
Hey Jenn! I'm so glad you are staying sane! Its pretty incredible that you keep things running the way you do! Good luck making the adjustment with two kids...I can't even imagine having one. On thursday I delivered a baby for the first time in my career! Ok, it was only a robot that gave birth to a robot baby, but it was still pretty cool.
Hang in there. You are doing great, I always give myself at least 6-8 weeks to feel absolutely out of control and then know, it will get better. He's darling and looking back, they grow so fast. Call me if you need to cry, I definitely had my days, and still do!
Amen, sister friend! I feel ya. Sounds like a few things out of the norm(in regards to recovery) on your platter. Hope things settle down sooner than later.
Oh Jenn, I hope things settle down for you soon! Good thing for parents!
Those boys are so worth all the grief you go through those first few weeks!
Oh, you just brought back all the memories that still keep me from having a third kid! Sheesh, those are hard times...
Here I am almost a year later, finally starting to get my home in order again! (Yeah, maybe a little TOO much slacking off...)
Good luck you guys! Before you know it, this new adventure will become regular life.
Oh, and I totally know what you mean about taking both kids somewhere by yourself! I still don't know how I do it!
Jenn, great job on prioritzing stuff that doesn't really matter! You will soon feel like you can get things done and you will do great! Just relax, play with Henry and like you said, enjoy this time that you have! Feel free to cry when going gets tough, because I've decided that is by far the best medicine sometimes.
Hooray for parents! So glad you had such a support system! Henry all of a sudden looks so much more older and mature. I definitely think rest is such a vital ingredient to recovery - I never saw it at the time, but now I do. I wish I would have snuck more naps and not tried to be a 'super mom.' Don't stress, relax, and take care of yourself.
I just read your review of "My Name is Asher Lev". I had remembered seeing it and I am excited you loved it. It is our new book club pick, I am looking fwd to reading it.
Isn't it funny that you completely forget how horrible the postpartum period can be? I totally feel your pain. I'm in the same boat right now...it will all pass soon though! Hang in there! :o)
Oh - so sorry it's been yucky. I'm glad you've had some family there to help out. Wish I was even closer so I could run over and take Henry for the afternoon - I know Olivia would just love him. I'd offer to come stay and help, but I think having me and my toddler in addition to your craziness would be much more hindrance then help! Hope things smooth out for you soon. You're amazing and your little ones are just precious.
Hang in there! I remember all too well the tears (more mine than the baby's). Just don't forget that while it feels like a long time when you're in the middle of it, it passes pretty quickly!
Hang in there. I don't have much else to say but I hope get it gets better soon. Keep us posted, I'll be thinking about you.
Oh Jenn, I am so sorry that recovery has been tough. Wait till your fourth baby its a piece of cake then. I wish I could come and help you. You know I would.
Things will get better I promise. I love that Ellis naps on you and Ben, that is how Avery sleeps.
The picture of your mom with the boys is priceless.
This is a tough time. New babies are so much work, moms aren't getting sleep, dads are busy, and I'm glad you have the sense to stop cleaning! I wish we were there to come grab Henry for Truck Time at Tina's. I'd love to call you, but would hate to interrupt a nap. If I don't hear from you in the next couple of weeks, I'm going to call you anyway. Regarding your comment on my blog, it's your blog that's always reminding me how much fun parenthood is. It's always full of funny things Henry is saying and doing. It's rare that I don't get a laugh from you! Love ya!
Oh man! You are making me very nervous! I hope things get better and you are able to adjust very soon!
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